Claire Bear-chan RIP Oct 2014-Feb 2017

Krair Krair,

Since you grew old and grew sick, I haven't seemed able to rouse myself to care as much for your hamster cousins. I still cannot quite believe that you are gone. I told myself someday, someday yes, but Claire's going to outlast them all. But we both know that denial is one of those classic stages of grief. I told myself not to cry but still I did. I'm still tearing as I type this.

I want to tell you what a wonderful hamster you are. That I appreciate all the days you were with me, and hope you forgive me for not being there often enough to sayang you towards the end. The back part of your body was still so nice, plush, soft and furry. But your face looked a lot like Old Man Ham and his suffering and infections. You were a trooper when you had all those warts. When they were growing and after they were removed. Do you remember how even the vet was impressed with you? 

You loved to clean yourself while on your back. You were very thorough. One paw at a time, and then your stomach and neck. You were so cute and so energetic doing it. Towards the end you hardly had the strength to do anything except to clean your face and to wheeze. You were always my fat and greedy hamster, and yet you rejected food and water. Even soft foods like cucumber and broccoli. You who always woke up from deep slumber when you smelled blocks and veg and oatmeal. It is true that when someone is about to die, they reject everything. Breathing took so much out of you and I'm relieved that at least you died peacefully in your sleep. No struggle, just slumped over with your ears at peace. You've run a long race my dear Claire. And you ended it in your own inimitable way. 

Thank you picking me as your master. Thank you for coming to our home and docilely, adorably, lovingly allowing us to play with you, pet you and spoil you. Thank you for never rejecting play time, cuddle time or feeding time. Thank you for thriving in and enjoying your toys and your homes. Thank you for keeping us awake in the wee hours with your exercise regime on the wheel. Thank you for being curious and easy-going. Thank you for trusting us so much and giving us so many moments to learn about and love a hamster. Thank you for being healthy and dependable for such a very long time. Thank you for being feisty in the friendliest way possible. I will miss your soft musky hamster smell and gentle ways for a long time.

But I am lucky that we have so many photos and videos of you. They show you at your best and at your worst, and through it all your wonderful personality shines through. There's you grooming Bola against his will. There's you sleeping on Meowf's hand. There's you running like a marathoner on your trusty wheel. There's your cute butt sticking out of your wooden house. There's you sleeping soundly surrounded by food. There's you waddling around your castle. There's you sitting on my hand like the best ever furry computer mouse. There's you drinking from your bottle for two full minutes. In all these photos and videos you're always so contented. 

You'll always be our heart ham. You were always the cutest when you were asleep. I hope you're having the snooze of your life now, and when you awake you'll get endless soft bedding to rearrange and treats to stuff in your pouches. 

Farewell my dearest Claire Bear-chan. Play well at the rainbow bridge my love.